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About Me Official Beta Tester Novelist cjwillis24/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 1 Year
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The Truthteller

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The downside of feeling better

Journal Entry: Tue Nov 24, 2009, 12:03 PM


Well, first I have to say why I've been feeling worse.

For the past four days or so, I've been feeling awful. Not physically, mentally. Just...how I put it to my husband was, I've felt like I did before I was put on Zoloft. Maybe a month before. And part of that was because the food/money for food situation hasn't been great of late, but I suspected that a big chunk of it was because it's now winter and I haven't been taking a vitamin D supplement for a couple months, and I'm very likely still deficient.

The UPside is that I know the demon and how to wrestle with it :D So I went out with the credit card, bought food that won't kill me, telling myself I'll just have to live because I can't go three days without eating just because there's nothing in the house my bio-molecular structure won't give the finger to, and found a liquid vitamin D supplement that's about as pure as you can get: no gluten, vegan-friendly, no preservatives, with an extra kick of cherry. I took a tablespoon of it last night, played a game with my husband, watched a movie with him, and went to bed an hour later than I have been the past two nights--which, by the way, I've been getting 8+ hours of sleep each night for the past three.

I feel SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MUCH BETTER... Oh my God, vitamin D is my friend... I'm so sorry, D, take me back, I'll never stray again, you're my one and only... Task for December: Make sure I get scheduled for that blood test to check my levels. I'm due for it in a couple weeks.

Unfortunately, when I feel better...I can cope with work better.

Bad thing? Yes. Because then I feel bad about leaving.

And today Don had to be WONDERFUL and keep me in a three hour meeting that discussed nothing but ARTICLE IDEAS for the upcoming newsletter. Yeah. He kept me in a room that was closed off from the ladies in the main office for THREE HOURS so I could bounce ideas to him about what I could WRITE for the newsletter. Meeting=bliss.

Now I have to tell myself too little, too late. That feels like such a bitch stance, but...it's true. If I could do nothing but have meetings like that, or just be his assistant, and not deal with Janine and Bunny and Esther... But that's not going to happen. They don't have the money for him to have an assistant, and I'm trained as their order processor. *sigh*

So I had to vent that for a minute. Remind myself that quitting is still the best thing for me. Enjoy that three hour meeting for what it was, but remember that three hours doesn't make up for two and a half years...

Thank you :D

PS: I'm going to keep taking the supplement. Just because I feel bad about quitting doesn't mean I wanna stop feeling good ;)


GOALS
To be revised. WOOT!


PROJECTS
Developing: :blahblah:, Writing/editing: :matrixfight:, Posting: :pc:

:pc: Fairytale Disasters
:matrixfight: Fate's Flaw
:matrixfight: A Bit of Fun
:matrixfight: How to Package your Manuscript
:matrixfight: Sha int Sun
:matrixfight: The Wakefields
:matrixfight: Renava Short story
:blahblah: Alexi
:blahblah: The Writer
:blahblah: Half elf tarot reader
:blahblah: The Golem
:blahblah: Close Encounter of the Dead Kind
:blahblah: Zoloft Adventures
:blahblah: Pilot and prissy girl
:blahblah: Coma
:blahblah: Dragon doc
:blahblah: Twist and Sever
:blahblah: Deathbringer
:blahblah: Laiste's Story
:blahblah: The Paladin
:blahblah: Kin Rei
:blahblah: One in the Water
:blahblah: Magic Council


Reading List
The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett
The Magicians by Lev Grossman
Discworld
The Belgariad
Redwall
Lorna Freeman's "Covenants"
  • Mood: Overwhelmed

Twitter

deviantID

I am a thinker. I just happen to think best with pen and paper.

Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Colorado
  • deviantWEAR sizing preference: XL
  • Interests: Writing, reading, walking, editing, people watching, singing, yoga, bellydancing
  • Favourite movie: Star Wars, Stardust, Snatch, Stranger Than Fiction, Flight of Dragons
  • Favourite band or musician: Evanescence, Within Temptation, Linkin Park, Lorenna McKennitt, Ozzy, Metallica, Apocalyptica
  • Favourite genre of music: Alternative, metal, Celtic, punk, techno
  • Favourite artist: M.C. Escher, Dali
  • Favourite poet or writer: Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, David Eddings, Mercedes Lackey
  • Operating System: Vista. Because...that's what new laptops come with.
  • MP3 player of choice: iPod
  • Favourite game: WoW, DDR, Guitar Hero
  • Favourite gaming platform: PS2 and Wii
  • Favourite cartoon character: Xavier Xanatos
  • Personal Quote: You don't have what you want because you're not getting what you want.
  • Tools of the Trade: Laptop, pen and paper when I can't get at my laptop, a jumpdrive, and an overactive imagination

Comments


:iconashasylum:
thanks for fav!
:iconwildrainoficeandfire:
:iconbowl1plz::iconbowl2plz:
:iconbowl3plz::iconbowl4plz: :iconeufrosis: :iconeufrosis: Thank you! :iconeufrosis: :iconeufrosis: :iconeufrosis:

--
The dream was always running ahead of me. To catch up, to live for a moment in unison with it, that was the miracle. (Anais Nin)
:icontolkienmaster:
thank you for the favorite :love:

--
"I wonder what's in a book while it's closed. I know it's full of letters printed on paper, but [..] something must be happening, because as soon as I open it, there's a whole story with people I don't know yet and all kinds of adventures and battles."
:iconcjwillis:
You're welcome!

--
Create because you must, and for no other reason.
:iconvronron:
OMG! I was absolutely shocked to see a deviation in my folder from you, only because you never seem to be around anymore. I missed your writing and hoped nothing bad had happened.
:iconcjwillis:
Yeah, a lot of stuff that can be defined as bad happened, really... It's in one of my journals, I think I titled it 'In the last six months I have.' I'm hoping to be back for good. 'Cause this place makes me feel better. :D

Glad to get a message from you!! :hug:

--
Create because you must, and for no other reason.
:iconvronron:
I was worried...that perhaps my concern would seem less genuine in comparison to others who comment all the time on your journal and deviation entries.
:iconcjwillis:
Absolutely not! I love all my regulars :D And if I recognize your username, which I do yours even after my long hiatus, then you comment enough to make your presence known, and therefore are a regular. Thank you for your concern, I really do appreciate it, Sweet :D :hug:

--
Create because you must, and for no other reason.
:icondarcknyt:
Thank you for adding "Things Lost, Things Gained" to your favorites. I'm glad to know you enjoyed it so much. :)

--
JDT :batman:
My Blog

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. -Heb. 11:1

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